Nido Qubein, President of High Point University

This book is filled with real life wisdom that can help you be more, do more, and serve more.

—Nido Qubein, President of High Point University

From Beyond the Mask

Your job in life is to be a ‘foxhole friend’ for as many people as you can.

Make a list of all the people who believe in you, with all your many capabilities and talents. Are you number one on the list? If not, then something needs fixing.

You can’t hide. From yourself, sure, sometimes. But usually not from the rest of us. And in the end, not from yourself either.

You aren’t what you do once. You are what you do all the time.

Life is about having purpose and dignity. There. That’s pretty much it. If you can help one person, then you have a purpose, and by helping them gain dignity, you do, too.

Having expectations of your own doesn’t mean you have pressure, it means you have purpose.

If you believe in yourself – your effort, your attention to detail, your integrity, your ultimate goals – then there’s zero risk involved in how you live your life.

Moments happen, no matter what you think you’re going to do to stop them from happening. But either the moments define you or you define the moments.

Live your life the way you want, never mind what anyone else may think, because it’s your life.

I looked unique so why not live a unique life. Why not be myself?

Believe it or not, for all the variety and choice in the world, there’s always an absolutely right way to do things.

Look in the mirror. Know yourself. Be yourself.

If your position is unique, then maybe don’t bother listening to people who think they’re so wise, when their experience of the world is so different.

There are only two choices before you, at all times: Accept what happened or slowly be ruined by what happened.

What we understand now is so tiny compared to what we have yet to understand.

Life is a gift, not a given.

When you look in the mirror, really look. If you’re just glancing, don’t waste your time (or the reflection’s).

I’ve mourned the loss of the 17-year-old Brian but celebrated the new and improved Brian who is stronger and heartier for having gone through what he did.

People see the ‘worst’ of me the moment they lay eyes on me. So why not just be who I am, which is so much better than what they may think I am. Nothing holds me back.

Whenever you do a favor for someone, however big or small, do it all the way—not halfway or three-quarters of the way. Do it in such a way that all they have to do is sit back, enjoy and appreciate the gesture.

If you’re not betting on yourself all the time, you’re just gambling.

We all have blind spots. When you’re in a room and you’re looking around for the idiot and you can’t find him, it’s probably you.

You simply can’t win at all costs. It’s a logical impossibility. It’s a statement that eats itself. If you have paid all the costs—damaging relationships, breaking laws, breaking your own ethical code—they you have lost. It doesn’t matter what it says on the scoreboard or your balance sheet.

Not many people have jarring facts about themselves, right there for everyone to see like I do. But everyone’s got something about which they’re self-conscious. Would a light-hearted comment about it help? Give expression to what you feel others might but don’t want to say.

When you help someone else, you help yourself in a way that can’t really be equaled by any other activity.

There can be no success, no real life success, period, without attention to people.

There is always a cost to avoiding confrontation, especially if the one you’re avoiding is you.